Relationship With Food - Feeling The Best I Have In Ages!

The decision to give up on this hyper-focus has probably been one of my better decisions of late. I am in the best place I have been regarding food for an extremely long time.

1. I am enjoying food
2. I am eating what I feel I want
3. I am not feeling bogged down by restrictions 
4. I am not going crazy & eating with abandon

Today I actually logged because I wanted to and I was hovering around the 1,600 mark. My BMR (how many calories I would burn if I just lay in bed all day not moving) is around 1,515-1,555 depending on which calculator is used, so seeing as I am actually moving around, I think this is okay. My maintenance is probably around 1,700-1,800. If I up the exercise, I can get away with more calories for maintenance (and weight loss too) so would probably be maintaining around the 1,900 to 2,100 mark.

Talking about exercise, this is going to be my focus for a bit. I think I shall keep an eye on my calories and try to aim for around 1,600 on my higher days, but I am not going to sweat it and get all tangled up in labels and numbers. I really want to concentrate more of my efforts on getting this body moving. I remember earlier in the year I was really enjoying doing yoga and some TurboJam and ballet workouts and fun stuff like that. I lost my way a bit due to not feeling well and also concentrating so hard on the food aspect of this journey. I really need to figure out more of a balance if I can. So focusing on the exercise part is a good start. I did a walk yesterday with the dog. I did keep my walks up as much as possible, which wasn't all that much at times due to the weather, but I do feel I made an effort, which is more than I can say for other things.

My exercise plan is to get kick-started with something different. I don't fancy doing TurboJam for some reason (mainly all the jumping around) so I think it's time to dig out Leslie Sansone and start Walk Away The Pounds again. Most of Leslie's workouts that I have looked at are PERFECT for people who have joint and muscle problems or who are very overweight/unfit/deconditioned as they are not focused on leaping around so much. They usually have good modifications. In terms of movement they are more of a power-walk than a run. Yet, in the past I have found them incredibly useful for burning calories and increasing my stamina. I do have one that is a bit more intense because it is intervals of strength training mixed with cardio, but the rest seem okay. So I shall start with the 3 mile one and see how I get on.

Lesson Learned & 5 Things

What did having a few days off from calorie counting and logging teach me?

It taught me that my one free day off a week is fine - it's too short to make me fall off the wagon and I slide back into calorie counting quite easily. However, a few days is way too long. I can break a habit (the calorie counting/logging) in a few days, whereas in one day, the habit is still there.

I try to view situations, events and occurences in life as happening for a reason; whether that be to enlighten you or help you move forward etc. In this case, while I struggled with the situation of going back to calorie counting and logging and feeling somewhat out of control, I do see that I have learned a lesson. I have learnt that at this point in time, I cannot take more than one, or at a push two, days off. So until I have reached my goal, I plan on not doing that again - it wasn't really my choice to do it in the first place, but if it happens again, I am going to have to figure out a better way to be accountable.

I have also learnt that I need to constantly think of ways to motivate myself...

So, I did 5 things I have learnt about myself since starting this 'diet and exercise change'. Now I must do the 5 things I have learned about myself and my relationship with food (much harder!!) -

1. TTOTM = crazy cravings for sugar. I give in to PMS cravings. I have mentioned this before, but I really need to figure out a way to address this.
2. I am starting to be really hungry for breakfast. I enjoy breakfast now.
3. I can eat less than I think I need and still feel satisfied. My stomach is shrinking. My eyes are bigger than my stomach!
4. I sometimes eat to make other people happy. E.g. eating a slice of cake or an extra 'thing' because someone else thinks I should, when actually I don't want it and/or am not hungry. Or even eating a course at a restaurant so the person does not feel left out!
5. I can still enjoy eating even when I have to stick to a certain amount of calories. This is something I struggle to realise... even now. I need to remind myself of this. Eating 1,200 or 1,400 calories doesn't mean you can't don't enjoy the food you eat. It just means that you have to make better choices about what you eat so that the food is really satisfying and nutritious.

This week I had the challenges as usual:


1. Only 1 weigh-in - CHECK
2. 90 minutes of cardio or walking - NOPE... managed to do 55 cardio, 40 Yoga
3. 2 sessions of weights or strength training exercises of your choice - NOPE... none!
4. 3 blog entries - CHECK
5. List 5 or 10 things you have learnt about yourself and your relationship with food since you started your recent weight loss journey (this can be 1 blog entry) - CHECK

I am getting tired of challenges. Though, to be honest, they do actually work to some extent. If I hadn't had the challenge at the back of my mind, I wouldn't have done the yoga!